Wednesday, December 13, 2006
My Treatise on the American Population
Over the 10 days we spent traveling to and around Walt Disney World, we were able to make a number of observations on why people suck. It's kind of an interesting sub-society because you have everyone from those who can spend $500 a night on a hotel room and think nothing of it to those who scrimp and save to be able to afford 75/night and then need to take PB&J to the park because they can't afford the burgers. And of course, all of us who fall somewhere in the middle.

What you come to realize is that people suck no matter what. Or at least have the ability to suck. Of course 95% of the people we encountered were fine human beings. It's just the 5% that really gets to ya.

1. Rude vs. Stupid
We began to notice this conundrum as early as out 7:30 am flight out to the East Coast. It's sort of a chicken or the egg deal. Are people rude simply in response to the stupidity of others---or do people use stupidity as a defense mechanism against rudeness? We tend to think stupid comes first, at least by the examples we saw, mostly those in the customer service industry dealing with the general population.

Of course there's those who are both rude and stupid, like the woman throwing a tantrum because she came 2 minutes early to a show and was surprised to find it packed. I'm not exactly sure what she wanted the worker types to do--kick out people who had lined up a good 30 minutes before the show so they would ensure a seat?

2. Those with a compelling need to break the rules
Look, I'm not a stickler for the rules, in general. Take your flash picture if you need to (even though it won't come out) but for the love of God, when they say "for the safety of our performers, no flash photography," seriously, pay attention. Do you really want to be the cause of some poor acrobat's tumbling accident.

Along the same lines, height requirements at rides were not designed to ruin your trip. They were designed to keep your kids safe. You look like an asshole if your kid is 6 inches to short to go on some scary ass ride and you're fighting with the teenager making 6 bucks an hour. Especially when your kid starts crying and you blame said teenager for ruining your trip. Perhaps you should have, oh I don't know, measured your kid so you know which rides are or are not appropriate.

3. Rudeness multiplies in crowds
We encountered several large groups of people traveling together, from 12 year old cheerleaders to 17 year old Brazilians to late middle aged folks. And as a whole, pretty much everyone traveling in a group of 8 or more sucked. I think it's the pack mentality, like if you're in a group, you can't be attacked by a giant shark. That could be the only possible explanation why these groups (sometimes numbering up to 20 or 25 people) attempted to take up as much room as possible while sticking together EVERYWHERE they went. Including the rides. Because it's so much more fun to have all 15 of you on the same car (even though you only sit next to one person).

And BTW, you are not automatically cooler because you're in a big group. It just makes the whole group that much lamer.

4. Parents who suck
People, people, please. Ducks should not eat pizza or french fries. I don't really care if your 2 year old is crying. Letting him feed the ducks high-fat foods is probably the lamest thing you could do to try and get him to stop. Also, see above RE: height restrictions.
Furthermore, if you're 2 year old usually goes to bed around 7:30 or 8, perhaps an 8 pm dinner reservation is not the way to go. I don't mind crying kids, especially at a family friendly place like WDW, but you possibly can't be enjoying yourself and I know the kidlet is miserable. Think about that for the future.

5. You are not disabled, just lazy
This one kills me. I have a serious injury. Not to the point where I can't walk, but enough that I have pain with pretty much anything I do, and I still didn't find the need for a wheelchair or one of those scooter things. If I had a nickel for every lazy person I saw using one of those devices, it might have paid for the whole trip. I of all people understand that not everyone has a visible disability (you certainly can't tell looking at me), but it's quite clear when you keep switching the vehicle around the various members of your party, you don't need it that much. And for those asshats who were drinking margaritas and running down small children, I pretty much wanted them to drive the lazy mobiles into the nearest deep water.

I feel so much better getting that out. We truly had a fabulous time. I'm just always on the lookout for blog fodder!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

This post is hysterical. I especially liked the rude vs. stupid.

Before I had kids, rude parents made me crazy. Now that I have my own kids, rude parents absolutely make my blood boil. I'm not sure I would have shown the level of understanding you did ("I don't mind crying kids, especially at a family friendly place like WDW...")

I do. I mind crying kids very much. The occasional sniffle or whatnot is part of the package-deal with children, but all-out tantrums and crying jags are not. Those are signs of selfish parents who need to take their kids home for much-needed rest. Not just for the kid, but for the rest of us too.

Blogger Zow Zow said...

It's hard. I don't like to judge parents too harshly, as I know no parent is perfect--everything a parent does is wrong to someone else.

On the other hand, I totally agree. I don't give a rat's ass that you spent 3 grand on this vacation and you're going to get the most out of it. Your kids are suffering. Get your head out of your ass and take care of them.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

LMAO......luvs the not disabled, but lazy.......Them people kills me too... Ya can't tell by lookin at me that me is in constant pain {{well mostly}} but the use of them vechicles should be for them that truly can't walk without falling or is in that much pain that it is required... just me own personal opinion mind you.......

An with the not disabled, just lazy add the people who goes on disability that is to freakin lazy to work an people who really need disability end up being so over screen to PROVE they is disabled is enof to make this girl pull her hair out by the roots......ROARRRRRRRRRRRRRR

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